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Stop Trying to Be Someone You Aren’t: Rock the Dream that Fits (or Skinny Jeans vs Carhartt Pants)

Dreams that fit

Ever driven a car that is out of alignment? You have to constantly pull on the steering wheel to stay on the road. Or remember the time the towels in the washing machine were all on one side and it started shimmying across the floor? (Trying to rebalance a load mid-cycle is particularly interesting at my house since the switch that turns off the machine when you open the lid is broken.)

Now imagine if the washing machine were a helicopter. It would be nearly impossible to fly. Don’t believe me? Check out this video of ground resonance where the helicopter literally shakes itself apart.

Are things that are out of alignment:

  • Efficient? No.
  • Fun? Not really.
  • Awkward? Definitely.

Why do we live our lives this way?

We’ve gotten used to it. It’s become normal.


A balanced life is when you are living in alignment with your values and purpose.

Sometimes we think, I should (be vegetarian, run marathons, travel the world). Or we think we *need* something to be happy (bigger house, better car, more money, less money, a partner, a different partner, you get the idea).

What if it isn’t a good fit?

It’s like me trying to look good in skinny jeans. As much as I value getting uncomfortable, this chica isn’t ever going to look good in them. But, I can rock the Carhartt and Bunny Boot look.

When you are living in alignment, things resonate and your gut says, “Yes!”

Stop trying to be someone you aren’t. [Tweet this]

The Greatest Adventure: Learning About Yourself

Gretchen Rubin said, “The greatest adventure is learning about yourself.”

In the first month of the Big Life Accountability Support Team we’ve learned:

1. Some of us take on too much.

2. Some of us need a push.

It isn’t rocket science, but you’d be amazed at the power behind knowing which you tend to be.

I fall into the first camp. I need to allow myself more of a buffer to blow off an afternoon and go fishing on the river. Time to do nothing. I have this internal mantra that says, “Be productive!” I’m learning to turn down that station and turn up the one that says, “You’ve done enough. You are enough.” Knowing my tendency to take on too much helps me pare down my to-do list without feeling like a slacker.

Others need to be pushed. They need an outside force to tell them to get moving. They need to find a group or an accountability partner to say, “You can do it!” or “One more lap!”

Finding the Dreams that Fit

Part of the adventure is learning which dreams fit and which are best left for others. This can only happen through exploration. Just like you wouldn’t buy jeans without trying them on, don’t accept a dream without making sure it is a good fit. Try it on. Wear it for a while, then decide if it fits.

Would it be cool to swim from Cuba to Florida? (Shout out to Diana Nyad. Regardless of the controversy, she’s an amazing swimmer) Sure, but that dream isn’t a good fit for me. This isn’t just because I don’t see myself as able (and let’s be real, I don’t) but because I’m not willing to give anything up to achieve the dream. It doesn’t speak to me.

Inspiring others to live Big Lives? Captivating. It’s my go-go juice.

It is a dream that fits.

What dreams do you have that are a perfect fit? Where having you been trying to squeeze into someone else’s dreams? Which dreams can you let go? What dreams are you going to try on? Share in the comments.

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